Flying solo...

As of lunchtime today I officially became a single parent. Kind of. It's actually quite a long, involved story but the gist of it is that my *partner* flew out to WA today and isn't set to return until Christmas, leaving me at home with the 5 rugrats and the belly bump, due in a little over 9 weeks. It's a daunting prospect but I think I'm up for the challenge. Or else I'm just doing a really good job of fooling myself.
To be honest I feel a little shell-shocked at the moment. We haven't had the best relationship and I was actually quite eager for the break, thinking the distance might give us a chance to take stock and maybe even learn to appreciate each other more. I've literally been counting the hours until he left. Having him home full-time over the last few weeks has been extremely trying and a little more than I could take, so I'd been looking forward to the space and the peace it would provide. However now he's gone I'm suprised to discover I feel somewhat lost. I never thought I'd say that. But it's true. I feel a strange emptiness knowing he isn't here. I'm sure I just need time to adjust, time to get used to things. And these damn pregnancy hormones probably aren't helping matters.
Anyway.... time will tell how I handle this solo parenting gig. I'm confident I'll manage, possibly even flourish. I always wondered what kind of mother I'd be without his outside influence. I guess now's my chance to find out. Wish me luck...